


Save you from yourself

by QueenOfALotOfDifferentWorlds



Series: MCU Crack Fics [8]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers Family, Bruce Banner Is a Good Bro, Clint Barton Is a Good Bro, Crack, Domestic Avengers, Domestic Fluff, Everyone Gets A Hug, Everyone Loves Tony Stark, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Found Family, Funny, I hate tagging, Kidnapping, Like seriously this is just a little crack thing, Loving boyfriends, M/M, Mentioning of what happened in Siberia, Multiverse, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, OC just trying to help, Post-Avengers (2012), Steve Rogers Gets a Hug, Steve Rogers Is a Good Bro, Steve loves Tony, Team as Family, This is just something nice, Tony Stark Gets a Hug, Tony loves Steve, but it didn't happen in this universe, but like funny!, i hope this is enough, mcu - Freeform, the canon is fucked up, this is why we have FanFics!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-18 16:29:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29612214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenOfALotOfDifferentWorlds/pseuds/QueenOfALotOfDifferentWorlds
Summary: Crack Fic one shotTony had wished something would save him from this boring meeting. As always the world gave him what he wanted. Yeah. Sure.Multiverse shenanigans, loving boyfriends and the Avengers are a big happy family!
Relationships: Bruce Banner & Tony Stark, Clint Barton & Tony Stark, Natasha Romanov & Tony Stark, Steve Rogers & Avengers Team, Steve Rogers & Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Tony Stark & Avengers Team
Series: MCU Crack Fics [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1836838
Comments: 19
Kudos: 57





	Save you from yourself

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Justanotherpuff](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Justanotherpuff/gifts), [De_Marvel_Bunny](https://archiveofourown.org/users/De_Marvel_Bunny/gifts).



> Hello everyone, 
> 
> I NEEDED something nice and happy and funny because I just hurt my poor boys again in Hydra's Revenge... and I wanted them happy! And the two lovely people I gifted this work to gave me this idea, so... I hope you like it!
> 
> This is NOT a part of "Slow Burn - The Series"!

Be careful what you wish for.

Just a stupid little thing to say. So very stupid. Wish for everything you want! Fight for it! If Tony didn’t dream as wild as he did – when he slept… or was sleep deprived to be honest – he wouldn’t have thought of at least half of the inventions he made.

And yes, Steve, the sentient toothbrush was a good idea. It was cursing a little much, maybe, but only if you didn’t brush your teeth right. Just get with the program!

The most terrible thing right now, aside from him being kidnapped by some witch or another, was that he _knew_ that Steve would tell him _I told you so_ as soon as they saved him. So, there was a legit reason for him to not want to be rescued. And to _never_ say that out loud or he would never be allowed to leave the Tower again. _Ever_.

Back to the problem at hand: Right before he had gone to the shareholder meeting, he had told Steve that he didn’t care what happened, as long as he got out of it. And Steve, of course, had told him with his stupid – beautiful – smile, be careful what you wish for.

At least he had been taken after Pepper had started the meeting, so she knew it wasn’t his fault. He was kidnapped! There were at least an 80% chance this wasn’t his fault.

Who was he kidding? It probably was his fault. Meh. That was life.

Looking up at the woman, he realized she was younger than he had originally thought, which was not very surprising, she had hidden her figure and face behind a cloak – very Hogwarts of her.

Which should be at least a little bit of a warning to Tony that she showed him her face right now. But then again, _Meh._ Everyone always thought they had made their cells Tony proof. No one ever did. And the very few chances he hadn’t been able to break out of it – yet! – it hadn’t been Thor, Hulk or Steve proved. So, whatever.

At least she hadn’t made a mess. That would have made Pepper just angrier. Instead, she had stepped out of the portal-thingy – a different thingy as Dr. Dumbledore used –, grabbed him rather forcefully and dragged him through it before he even realized what was happening.

In retrospect, it might have been a bad idea to use desk chairs with roles in his conference room. But the old assholes from the board had said it was a bad idea… so… of course Tony had bought twenty of them and he, Thor and Clint had hidden all chairs… so… whatever.

Looking around, Tony catalogued everything he saw. Behind the woman was a door, probably leading into an abandoned building. The room they were in was looking like a former office. Shoved into the corner was a desk and a chair. Empty shelves were leaning at the walls, some papers still lying around.

This place was practically begging Tony to light it up.

“Are you okay?”

Tony raised an eyebrow at that question. The woman had brown hair, grey eyes, was shorter than even Tony and looked to be in her early twenties.

“Peachy. You actually saved me form a very slow and painful death by boredom.” He leaned back in his chair, crossing his legs and smiling at the woman. As long as she didn’t try to force him to work, they could be civil.

“Oh, I saved you from more than just boredom.” Her expression, before that sentence had been open, almost shy. Now she looked grieve stricken, maybe even fearful.

“Oooookay.” Leaning forward, he put his arms on his knees and tilted his head some. “Why don’t you tell me why you kidnapped me.”

“I didn’t- I just...” She inhaled, visibly calming herself. Taking a step back, she grabbed a chair and sat down on it, facing Tony.

“You are not kidnapped. You can leave at any time. But if you wanna live, you have to listen to me.”

“Ooooookay.” This seemed to be the best response for a lot of things, right now.

“Yes, I, this is going to be… hard for you to hear, I know. I’m sorry for that. I don’t want to… I don’t want to hurt you. I mean I’m not going to hurt you, but I have to tell you and-”

“I’m all for not hurting me, so yeay for that.” Tony interrupted her, smiling calmingly at the distressed woman. Distressed magic using kidnappers normally weren’t a good thing. And when even Tony could recognize that, you knew it really wasn’t good.

“Why don’t you start at the beginning?”

“I… okay, yeah.” She said, leaning back a bit, clasping her hands in front of her.

“And if you don’t mind, start with a name, I assume you know mine.” He smiled at her, crookedly. He had already seen her face. A name wouldn’t make it worse, right?

“Oh, yes, I’m Luca, sorry.”

“Tony.”

Luca smiled, a little exasperated. “Yeah, I know.”

“I know that you know, but I’m threatened with injury or death if I’m not at least trying to be polite.” Tony smiled back, trying to keep it light.

Her face fell, pain and desperation crawling into her eyes.

That worked well.

“Why are you here?” The better question would be why he was here, but let’s keep it focused on Luca for now.

“You’re in danger.”

Tony nodded. Sure, yeah, he was an Avenger, the former Merchant of Death and the people loved to hate him. This was nothing new. And definitely wasn’t a good enough reason to kidnap him. Actually, it was a perfect reason! If she wasn’t a coocoo-case, how high were the chances he would get away with it if she kidnapped him again in the future?

“I… I don’t know how to say this, so I’m just going to tell you.” She stopped.

Tony had to bite down hard on his tongue to not tell her that that was mostly the part where people started to say something.

“The Avengers will betray you. And Rogers… he will try to kill you.”

The breath Tony had just taken froze in his lungs. What the fuck?

“I know, I’m sorry, I didn’t… But you have to listen to me. They are using you! They are… they don’t deserve you! They don’t appreciate you and they will betray you and Rogers will try to kill you and then leave you to die in Siberia!”

“What?” He croaked, barely able to keep his voice under control.

What the fuck? 

-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-

“Captain?”

“Yes, Jarvis?”

Although the AI’s voice was urgent, he kept his eyes on his sketch just a moment longer. Tony was in a meeting, so he was fine. And New York would most likely keep standing a moment longer.

“Sir has just been kidnapped.”

Steve snapped the pencil in two.

“ _What_?!?”

-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-

“I know, you… okay, listen!”

Tony was listening. But the crap Luca was saying didn’t make sense. Not even a little bit.

“I… You will understand, just… okay.” She exhaled, harshly, looking up apologetic. “Your parents didn’t die in a car crash.”

Tony froze.

“They were killed by Hydra. By the Winter Soldier. And Steve knows.”

“How do you know that?” Tony rasped.

“I’ve seen it.” She looked miserable, as if she really was sorry to tell him this. “He knows since Shield fell and he didn’t tell you because he wanted you to help him find Barnes.”

“No.”

“Yes, Mr. Stark, this is the truth, I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s not!” Tony growled.

“It is. I’ve seen it. I saw how it would end! With you bleeding on the ground and Rogers smashing his Shield into your-”

“Stop!”

Her mouth snapped shut, but her eyes said enough. She really believed this. She believed all of it.

“I’m sorry, but it’s the truth.”

“No.”

“It is. I’m sorry that you had to learn about it like this, but it is better than to see the video in a bunker surrounded by Rogers and Barnes.”

“I’ve seen it.”

Luca flinched. “What?”

“I’ve seen it. I know.”

“What?” She looked horrified. “But I saw Rogers at the Tower!”

“Of course, he is in the Tower! He is my fucking boyfriend!” (Pun intended.)

“He is- You forgave him?!?”

“There was nothing to forgive!”

“Nothing to-” She stopped, breathing hard, as if she was seconds away from going nuclear. Which would be okay for Tony, because he was ready to go nuclear, too. Luca either was a nutcase that really believed this and honestly wanted to save Tony – even if it was absolutely fucking stupid – or she wanted to try to start a war between the Avengers. Which would make her even more crazy. If she really did spy on them, she must know that the Avengers were a family. That reminded him, he needed to make the Tower magic-proof ASAP.

“He lied to you!” She almost screamed this at him, frustrated – and almost hurt?

“He didn’t! I found out that Bucky-”

“He still knew!”

“He didn’t!” Tony yelled, his words hard and cutting. “I found out. I told him. He didn’t hide anything from me!”

“No, he-”

“I swear to you, I told him what the Winter Soldier did. He didn’t know. And he would never betray me. He loves me!”

“He-” She stopped dead. “What?”

“He loves me!” It was still something Tony couldn’t believe, even a year after they had started dating. Or courting, as Steve liked to call it. The sap.

“And I love him. He would never betray me. I know that. And the others wouldn’t either. Never.” And he believed that. Sure, they might someday realize what a mess Tony was and might even leave him behind, but they would never betray him. They wouldn’t try to kill him. Unless he turned himself into a supervillain and tried to take over the world. But in that case, he would have betrayed them first.

“No, I- I saw it! They treated you like shit and-”

“They don’t!”

“They do! I saw it! You need to understand. Whatever they are doing to you-”

“They are not doing anything! I’m happy!”

“No, this…” She looked desperate now, as if she was about to snap, which – to be honest – was probably a big red flag, but – news flash! – so was Tony. Everyone could think whatever they wanted about Tony, because, hell, they were probably right anyway, but he would not let this _girl_ tell these lies about his family!

“This is wrong! They treat you horribly and will betray you and-”

“It’s wrong that they don’t treat me like shit?”

“No! You don’t deserve any of it!”

“To be loved?” Not that he disagreed.

“No! Of course, you deserve to be loved!” Luca looked more than desperate by now. Good.

Tony didn’t answer. What the fuck was going on?

“I’m here to save you from yourself!”

“Don’t take it the wrong way, honey, but aside from getting me out of that meeting, you aren’t all that convincing.”

“You… I…”

“Let’s start at the beginning again, okay?” Because by now, the Avengers must be on their way, right? Maybe Bruce could talk her down, he had this calm, understanding smile. Or would she think that _Bruce_ would ever betray Tony?

“After Ultron-”

“Who is Ultron?”

“ _Who is Ultron_?”

“I asked first.”

Luca gaped at him.

“You don’t-” She stopped, her mouth closing slowly. “You don’t.” Her eyes widened almost comically, before she went pale – or paler.

“Wanda Maximoff?”

“Never heard of her.”

“The Mandarin?”

“Yeah, we defeated him a while ago, nasty asshole.”

“Extremis?”

“Sounds like fun, is it a thing or a person?”

“Shit I’m in the wrong universe.”

“I beg your pardon?”

Groaning, Luca let herself sag forward, bracing her arms on her knees and her forehead on her arms.

He didn’t say it, but Tony felt like this was another good moment for a heartfelt _ooooooookay_.

“You okay there?”

“I’m in the wrong universe.” She groaned, as if hurt.

“Yeah, heard you before. What does that mean?” Not that he didn’t believe in the Multiverse – and was thrilled to obviously have proof sitting right in front of him. If she wasn’t an escaped resident of coocoo-town.

“I am…” the young woman sat up again, a blush blooming on her cheeks. “I learned some magic and started to, well, look into other worlds and found you. Another you. But that other you… he was betrayed by the Avengers and I knew I had to save him.”

“Okay, that’s nice but aside from the fact that you will tell me everything you know about the Multiverse, and no, that is not debatable, are you sure that other Tony didn’t deserve that.”

Her eyes sharpened, her glance getting hard and threatening.

“He didn’t.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I’m sure. He did nothing wrong.”

“I presume he was the Merchant of Death, too?”

“Yes, but in that instance-”

“Are you sure, I know how I can get.”

“It wasn’t his fault!”

“Okay.” Tony sat back again. It seemed that other Tony had a fan. Good for him. He could have her back. Like, right now.

“What are you going to do?”

Relaxing her shoulders, Luca leaned back in her chair, looking thoughtfully at him.

“You’re sure, you’re okay?”

Sighing, Tony sat back as well. “Positive.”

-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-

“ATA?”

“Two minutes.”

Steve nodded, his shoulders tense. Two more minutes. That made almost two hours. Two hours in which that person had Tony to themselves. In which they could have done anything to him and-

Steve shook his head hard. No. He was fine. They would be there in less than two minutes and he would get his Tony back.

Landing, he looked at his team. His family.

Bruce, who would stay back as long as they didn’t need him to be available if Tony needed medical treatment.

Natasha, whose face promised pain and death to anyone who put their hands on Tony.

Clint, who already held an arrow in his hand, just waiting to shoot it.

Dr. Strange, who had taken almost one and a half hours to find Tony’s location and then told them they couldn’t use magic to get close because the kidnapper would know that.

“Let’s go.”

-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-

“And then he looked up and said _ups_!”

Luca, who had already tears leaking out of her eyes because she was laughing so hard, almost choked.

“Seriously, I was sure Nat was going to kill him!”

It was that exact moment that the door behind Luca was thrown open violently and Steve, Strangy, Nat and Clint stormed into the room, stopping with raised weapons – and shield – to stare at both of them.

“Speaking of the devil!” Tony waved at Steve. “Steve, my love, tell her you actually thought I was dying again because you had forgotten about Valentine’s day!”

A blush spread over Steve’s cheeks, his tense shoulders sagging. “Tony-”

“What the fuck, Stark?” Clint growled, but before Luca could react to it, and Tony saw her getting wary, he stepped in.

“I love you, too, Birdbrain. False alarm, everyone. She stopped at the wrong universe.”

“What?”

-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-

Two hours later, Luca was on her way to the other universe, having it located with Dumbledore’s help, after threatening the Avengers with the promise that she would come back, if they mistreated Tony. Which was as cute as it was embarrassing.

Especially as all of them – not Dumbledore – glared at her threateningly and Steve swore that he would love and cherish Tony for as long as he was allowed. Which, Tony was not gonna lie, had him almost tearing up.

“Next time you show up, tell me whether or not I was right.”

“Sure thing, Tony.” Luca smiled at him.

“But please don’t kidnap him.” Steve said, hugging Tony even tighter. He hadn’t moved from his spot just behind Tony – not even for a second – after making sure this, in fact, wasn’t a hostage situation any longer.

Luca had watched it all with curious eyes, smiling when she saw the care Steve used to touch Tony. The way he pressed reassuring kisses to Tony’s cheek and relaxed when he had made sure his lover was fine and safe.

-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-

Being back in the Tower Tony calmed down Pepper (who had stopped the meeting after he was kidnapped and moved it to next week, which was just cruel) and Rhodey (who was already on a plane to get back to New York. Silver linings).

After Bruce had cleared him (Tony had tried everything in his power to get out of the mandatory checkup. It had literally just been a conversation. The five very angry superheroes glaring at him and his very pissed off AI’s silence told Tony in a very subtle way it would be easier for him to just accept it. That is why he only fought it for about forty-five minutes.) Steve took him up to their floor, curling around him protectively.

Tony just soaked in the warmth and the kisses. Whispering to Steve that he was fine. That nothing happened. That he loved Steve.

“I love you, too.”

“I know, my love, I know.” Tony pressed his face into Steve’s warm chest, grinning to himself.

“Tony?”

“Yes?"

“I told you so.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, please leave a kudos and a comment (they mean the world to me!)
> 
> Stay safe, sane and if you want to suffer, check out my other series ;)


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